Keeping Play Fun

Goddesses Rules, Safe Words, and Sanitary Precautions
Safe Words
Hard Limits
It is important to recognize that everyone (tops/bottoms) has "limits". These are things they do not wish to experience/engage in. These are discussed prior to starting a scene/session, during a negotiation. 
Goddess will tell you her limits, and expects you to be honest about your own limits. 
If you are wishing to test  your limits, this can be done with good communication and use of safe words/numbers. 
All limits are to be respected by both parties. This is essential to everyones safety and enjoyment. 
For most BDSM scenarios Goddess uses the words: Red, Yellow, Green. "Red" means "full stop", and the scene is halted/paused to assess what is bothering the submissive/client. "Yellow" means "getting too intense", and the activity is scaled back to a previous level the submissive/client was comfortable with. "Green" means "all good". 
Goddess may ask you "what's your color" at any time during a session. You may also call out a color at any time. 

For impact scenes (consensual striking of the submissive), Goddess prefers a number system (1-10). 10 is akin to "red", 8-9 are like saying "yellow". The number system is a pain scale that helps the Dominant understand where the client is at, and how much more force may be used. The numbers 1-7 provide better insight into pain tolerance than "green". 
You may be asked "your number" at any time during an impact scene. You may also call out a number anytime you think Goddess needs to know it. 
For scenes where the submissive is consensually gagged, a visual cue will be incorporated, so the submissive is still able to express limits effectively. 

Consensual Non-Consent is a term used to describe scenes/play/sessions in which there is a role-play of one person being harmed/punished or controlled against their will. The entire scene may be designed around this concept, or it may simply be a place the bottome/submissive/client likes to go in their head during a scene. 
For this reason, the words "no", "stop", "please don't" are not used as safe words. Using colors or numbers allows the bottom/submissive/client to play out these scenarios, while still having clear ways to keep the scene consensual, safe, and fun. 

Grappling/Fighting Scenes

Rules and limits for wrestling, boxing, or any competitive/semi-competitive, or "fantasy" fight scenes will be discussed and negotiated on an individual basis. There are some basic rules that must be followed for everyones safety:​

  • If it wasn't negotiated, don't do it. 
  • NO armbars, choking, joint locks, or striking without preapproval (permission sometimes given for regular clients that know how to do these safely).
  • ​No landing on opponent from higher than kneeling
  • ​No throwing opponent without prior training
  • No hair pulling
  • ​No eye jabs/pokes/elbows/intentional strikes. 
  • ​No scratching or biting
  • ​No groin strikes
  • ​No blows to the kidney/liver
  • ​If someone passes out, taps out, or says "tap", all fighting ceases immediately. It is only resumed when both parties are lucid and give consent.
  • ​No bracing against objects or walls during grappling
  • No throwing people against walls or objects
  • ​No weapons of any kind are allowed in a session
  • ​If someone is unable to defend themselves for any reason, the fight stops.

Accidents Happen​​

There isn't an activity in BDSM, or in contact sports that is entirely risk free. When you choose to engage in these activities, you must accept that there is some risk that things may not go perfectly every time. 
​It is important that you play with someone you trust to have your best interests in mind. But, even taking every safety precaucion, there will always be risks. Clients are encouraged to ask about the risks of different activities. They are also encouraged to do their own research into the potential dangers of the activities they engage in. It is YOUR responsibility to understand your health/medical issues, and to inform Goddess.

How I Clean My Toys and Implements

  1. Basic Cleaning
    All toys, furniture, and implements are sprayed with alcohol after being used. This is a basic precaution taken even in the absence of blood and bodily fluids.
  2. Metals
    Depending on the implement, it's size, whether it is exclusively metal, or also has fabric/leather, it may be either autoclaved, boiled, or treated with cavicide or madacide.
  3. Rope
    I use jute rope. Jute can be boiled, sprayed with alcohol, or placed in the dishwasher depending on what it is soiled with. Cleaning methods may degrade and deform the rope over time. Tension is used during drying to prevent deforming the rope. Rope is replaced when it begins to show signs of wear/deterioration.
  4. Leather
    When exposed to blood, or other hazardous bodily fluids, the leather is saturated with Madacide. This is allowed to dry before treating the leather with a conditioner to prevent deterioration as much as possible. The leather implement treated this way is then not used for a period of three weeks. A backup replacement is used during this time.
  5. Wood
    Wood and composite canes and other implements are wiped with alcohol after each use, as a general sanitary precaution. If soiled with blood or other bodily fluids, Cavicide is used to clean them.
  6. Gags, silicones, plastics
    Fabric gags and blindfolds are washed and dried like normal clothing after each use (not hand washed). Silicones and plastics are either boiled or put in the dishwasher. If the silicone or plastic is part of an implement made of multiple materials, it will be cleaned with either alcohol or madacide, depending on what it's soiled with.
There are a variety of opinions among practitioners of BDSM as well as among lifestylers about the best practices for cleaning implements, and maintaining sanitary/safe play environments. Goddess uses both scientific information and practicality in choosing her methods. It is important to recognize that there is no such thing as a completely sterile play environment. 
Some submissives/bottoms prefer to keep their own set of toys that is used exclusively on them. This is the best way to avoid transfer of microbes/infections between people. 

Most toys cannot be perfectly sterilized, and most toys owned by any dominatrix or dungeon have at some point or another been used to strike someones genitals. Please recognize that when you play, you always do so at your own risk. 

Additional safety precautions I use:
  • Nitrile gloves are used instead of latex (please let me know if you have an allergy - toys and clothing can be latex also)
  • Needles (for needleplay) are always bought in sterile individual packages, and never reused. They are disposed of immediately in a sharps container after being removed. 
  • ​I clean my personal grappling mats with Clear Gear Sports Cleaner after every use. If I am renting a facility for a grappling session, I will use the facilities cleaning products to clean their mats before and after each session.